Wednesday, January 28, 2009

what is life?

warning: coming up is a post for me to rant out bu bottled content.
if u're going to judge me based on this, then Scram
because THIS IS MY PAGE.


ive been wanting to spill out everything. from how i feel to how things are now.
from relaitonships to my physical state.

currently, its heartwarming to know that im finally out of that dark rough patch with obscure view of my future and status.
everything was so bleak.
i don;t deny it was due to sabotage, and i don't know why. i finally understood human behaviour and emotions more.
ive always thought i was someone who cld hold strong control over emotions. but when all those came flooding in, i was overwhelmed. totally at lost.
i don't deny my egoistic side forced me to stand out to face all odds still, showing no evident emotional fluctuations. it was tough, but its the real me. i do have emo moments underneath my jovial cheerful surface.


i am a true blue cancer. sensitive , highly receptive to changes.
to be frank, its not just school, but family. all these episodes made me think if my existance is important. wld be it better if i disappeaered? wld the world be better off without me?
i don't understand. i secretly fantasized the best way to end everything.
but to think of it, its not worthwhile. ive been living for fking 17yrs, and im finally turning 18.
i have so mnay unfufilled fantasies. i want to do so many things, i want to experience life to fullest. i want to enjoy my life since its the gift of god. why'd i wanna end his wonderful creation of me?



its getting gospel, but im free in thinking, i believe what goes around comes around.
i ain;t a stornch in any belief.



rant a tant-tant. again, im confused whats going on with my physical state. i did nothing, and lifes just as normal. ive lost weight tremendously, in a matter of weeks. its like losing 1kg every 2 days.. i don't know. ive lost like.. 5kg still counting everyday. i look outstandingly , i say outstandingly pale with no touch ups. i think i am healthy. its alarming. ive nv experienced this. ive also lost my zest for gourmet, and u know, urge. lets emphasise again, what's life without food and urges? u tell me.

urgh. this is getting frustrating. forget abt it, let it be lost. i don't give a mtherfking damn abt it.
ive much more impt thigns to attend to. right now, i want to study, find love from everybdy, and fidn more reasons to love myself. i have to be a narcissist.


to end my conclusion, this is life when ur at the bottom. its like a business cycle.
you start off with nothing then u hike up to the peak, then tumble to a recession, and the bottom pit which is the trough. and u realise everything's not going well, u remedify it, u get back on track for recovery. finally, back to peaK and this cycle goes on and on and on until your last breath.


uve got no reason not to believe this.





oh well, everything's fine now. today, is the day, i feel love vibes from everyone again.
theres nothing else i can say. i am not the sort who'l forget u once we get in touch lesser. i do bother to maintain relationships. i cherish everybody who once walked into my life.



Sunday, January 25, 2009





























yes, Mr. DIRECTOR's approved proposal.

FOM was a breeze with jiahui jocelyn edmund n jj.
had lots of fun during research, promotions, and sunday meetups!

aww. i love this group combi. its really the best !


missing of jiahui and jj.




Sunday, January 18, 2009


Life is all about flu and Hiccups.


perhaps.. hickeys too?
haha jk.



had my reunion dinner with paternal family today. exactly a week earlier. so i can celebrate actual with my family. u know.. mother..

aft tt, wenton nostalgic car ride with papa. shared many interesting childhood adventures of him when he was young.

oh, and discovered that my family tree actually extends out to msia, aussie, antartica and holland! wow.

didnt know i have angmoh cousins until i saw pictures. gagaga.


heh, and now i finally understand why ppl always say my grandpa generation's very scandalous. cz my granddad and his brothers are REALLY SERIOUSLY FKING HANDSOME. with sharp defined features, and super stylo milo hair. hahaha.
like modern days MODELS posing on motorbike.


me:'' who is this handsome young man?? i like eh..''
papa: '' uhh.. your grandfather's brother. ''

walao.






then shopping with edmund. i promised i wld shop with ya. and i did, like your mommy.
LOL.


im feeling ecstatic with my amazing finds!
jockey-alike British-India, and HELLOLULU lappy bag!



garments are all about material, seaming and comfort.






confucious says:
don't be afraid of people misunderstanding you,
be afraid of you misunderstanding people instead.



Thursday, January 15, 2009


today started off well with homework@ 6am in the morning.
followed by Econs with Mr Sin.
he's a rather humorous man with a square mind.
when asked what i name my new toy elephant, he paused and thought. '' Jumbo!''



oh well.. fyi. im a very generic person. i name my toys, pets, stuff with generic names.
'' Elephant''
that simple. hahaha. only edward got it.





rushed off to cont FOM proj final touchups, its time to get our props ready!!
im really really happy elated ecsatic full of joy that we sucessfully had our 1st ever chronoplastic swatch poster printed!! yay! on high glossed photo paper. cool eh. *credits to jiahui's pop disc card*







2nd half of the day was spent at Qifa Primary school!
went there to be a tutor-teacher-mentor for the 1st time! woohoo.
very happy that my initially very tired worn out bored mentee liked my teaching style! taught her ahead of syllabus too. hohoho. i can sign up with MOE.

she was really small for a P5.. looking like a P2.
you know, very skinny, small indian girl.
taught her eng, math science.
she was rather weak in her vocabulary, hence the only way was to use dramatic storyline, actions and intonations to catch her attention for her to understand.
yeah... very very fufilling task.

other mentors looked at me as if i was mentally unsound. hahaha


how do you explain '' cry over spilt milk'' between ''cry into spilt milk'' and ''cry on spilt milk'' and ''cry out spilt milk'' ???



idioms are hard to explain. hence, '' u read more books, ull understand when u grow up'' -.-

happy to meet new community of Mentoring club members! ive extended my network again!everybody there is nice and passionate! woohoo

Tuesday, January 13, 2009


schoolgirl fetish


woohoo. CRS is finally over!
we;re still goin to celebrate thoough it sucked big time.
we're told to be the worst group ever with little research, really started only the day before presentation. whahaha.


have so mnay more impt things to do. at this point of time, every SB student will learn to be terrific jugglers! hoho.
down to 7 projects!


to add on, i wanna thank SITI nurulfah jiejie for letting me RIP her circus. aww/..
stupid russell, i still found a way to circumvent your restriction! hohohoho.





heh, ppl must have thought i used to be some stupid TemasekJ dropout.....




Sunday, January 11, 2009


its been a week!
term4 is really overwhelming everyone.
you see mood indicators going up and down and down.



im glad to know new awesome people from MediaComm.
we must gather everyone to party tog someday. tt 8weeks holi ok.

i cant wait for SHA&SHA's. its just too grand! lets all puke the night away!




8 projects on hand now.
lets collate:

1: Marketing
2: Critical reasoning skills
3: CD
4: Itab II
5: unfinished AD
6: SPSU freshman orientation weekend activity
7: SPSU freshman orientation
8: SB Freshman programme




its all taking over me. too many things , too little time.
also, im too busy to care what people think about me anymore.
Only retail therapy works for me.
lets so shopping! Stella mccartney here i come! next stop is Y3!
race to riches baby.





esp you, i know you are the malicious one. you want a piece of me? we shall play fetch.
i've been observing you.



Monday, January 5, 2009


This is absolutely so me.
plamistry is fun! try it!

http://www.handanalysis.com/
heh, i am dependable and no-nonsense. get it?


another day in school!
was late for FOM so i had to so 3 rounds of catwalk+poses. and 1song. ( george said i was best sia.)
okay, accomplished it.
for the sake of my participation pts and card, went on to be part time tutor.
and came out with advertisement for our scented product!
was so funny, i had to act like the Rexona ad, and then followed by edward n mara whistling to my enhanced seductive appeal.

while YY n jerry had to act like random joggers ending up dating cz YY used the spray.
hahaha


crashed other ppl lecture, and more gossips. hohoho.

played with macbook webcam warpped my entire face. will post up those pics someday.. really unglam ones.








Sunday, January 4, 2009


Honesty is the best policy.
as usual, FOM at raffles city sc Swatch.
this time , we befriended the same sales guy we consulted the other time.


featuring... Paul Chan. our friendly but FF looking staff. haha
he looks kinda bitchy, but he's real nice once u getta know him.
nice enough to let us take pictures of him working. =)



then off for a gloria jeans indulge. with jiahui & edmund.
found a white package , to my curiosity, opened it and discovered stack of money inside!
woohoo.
the best thing is, i didnt even have the slightest intention to keep it.
thankfully, it an envelope from swissotel, with name, room number.
returned to conceirge, and the owner a caucasian lady called!
she kept thanking and cld hear she got emotional at one pt.
she kept offering money to reward my honesty.. and asked if theres anythign else she cld do.
so i told her its okay, anyone wld have done the same thing if they were to find it.





sigh.should have asked her to take me away with her for a holiday to her place.
who knows she might me Bill Gates wife or daughter.hahaha.







oh well, mom said i have morals but stupid. =( why...



conclusion. i strongly disagree that it is best to let parents teach their children values in life.



Saturday, January 3, 2009


New years eve day.
late 3 hours for school on NYE, blah.. went down cz wanted to follow up on party.
everyone was practically in party mood. even Mr George. hurrying everything to flee.
went to twilight with wanting, shazling edmund alex. was soooo awesome, i wouldnt mind shedding off my asexual status
to have a boyfriend like Cullen. omfg. he's so strong i can ask him repair things for me. he's so fast, i can ask him teleport me when im late.
he's so cute i want to kiss him everytime i see him. awwww.






Thursday, January 1, 2009





u see her eyes popping out. comparable to guiness world record eye popping woman.